Phrases that have pissed Ed off today

[sobrique]

I've just had an email which has

"Since I'm not here next week, it would be good if you could spend an hour or two early next week..."

This annoys me. Pinpointing exactly _why_ is not so easy. Maybe it's because .. actually, I had other things I needed doing 'early next week'. Maybe it's because it's an order to do some work, just disguised and weaseled a bit.

"It would be good if you could stand there for 10 minutes whilst I beat the snot out of you with a baseball bat before telling you to fuck off and die".

"It would be good if you could just go and stand on that fire for a bit."

How about "Would you mind ..." "Can you please ..." "There's an important thingy on wednesday, and would like to claim the credit for implementing this project myself, but need you to put this in place for me first".

Bah.

The other 'phrase' that annoys me is the word cascade.
As in "here is some really important information. Please cascade through the organisation".

*AWOOGA* *AWOOGA* *AWOOGA* Manglement Wank Word WARNING.

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=cascade

Not a waterfall. Series of units? URGH.
What's wrong with 'distribute'. Could you 'distribute this information'.
Maybe it's the implication of 'downhill' that cascade implies that annoys me.

I suppose that it links too closely with "shit flows downwards". Only in this case it's bullshit rather than the more conventional 'stuff going wrong and picking up the pieces' kind of shit.

Ah well.

Comments

[drivenapart.livejournal.com]

The other 'phrase' that annoys me is the word cascade.
As in "here is some really important information. Please cascade through the organisation".

Actually, it had one definition showing that it is slang for vomit.

Which I feel is accurate enough, and something that I frequently do when the word cascade is used.

[crashbarrier.livejournal.com]

do you think people have watched the office??

or mayb they haven't????

[mavnn.livejournal.com]

That's the really scary thing - managers must know by now how crap management BS sounds to the rest of us, but they still use it.

Do they think that they're own personal bs is so much better than anyone else's that it sounds different? Even though they're using the same words?

Or do they just think that their particular peons are so much dimmer than everyone else's that we won't notice?

[sobrique.livejournal.com]

We used to have a wank word bingo game at management presentations. Until one of our _local_ managers tipped off the "director" that we were counting them....

I think they know. But in much the same way as there's a nomenclature within any profession - In IT you end up with lines like "Can you re-patch the fibre in director CNX2-24 - I've lost the LUNs on XN32WW". In management you end up with "We need to think outside the box in order to leverage our synergies - could you cascade this through your organisation".

It's mostly just making stuff up :)

[xarrion.livejournal.com]

What's wrong with 'distribute'. Could you 'distribute this information'.
Maybe it's the implication of 'downhill' that cascade implies that annoys me.

I think you should put in a complaint - most companies nowadays like to try (or make it look like they're trying) to make employees feel respected - it's the whole Investor In People ethos.
Inferring the whole 'you people are below me' thing could be seen as counterproductive and derogatory, so I reckon you might be able to get him told off for it. ;)

[sobrique.livejournal.com]

Now you see, whilst in _theory_ there is a culture where such a thing is possible, in _practice_ doing such a thing would be a CLM - Career Limiting Maneuver.