Interdependance
Apr. 7th, 2004 04:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sobriqueI realised something today.
I don't like being dependant on someone else.
Today I got a lift to tescos to get some shopping. And it seems strange, but I felt uneasy doing so.
Which is odd, because the other way round, I'd have been quite comfortable.
I think I've figured something out. I don't like owing a debt to someone who I'm not sure I could repay. I guess it's one of these karmic balance things. I don't like asking for a favour from someone, because whilst in many cases I'm aware that I'd be able to, I don't want to inconvenience. I think it's because I don't like to be thought of as a burden, or a 'taker'.
There's the old adage that "A friend in need, is a friend indeed". But putting it to the test is not something that a friend would do.
The problem is, that neither actually make for a growth in friendship. Any relationship is about giving and taking.
I don't think that giving but not taking is any better than taking but not giving. At one extreme you have a parasite. At the other a loner.
One of the cornerstones of friendship, I believe, is the ability to help someone who doesn't need it.
A friend in need is an opportunity to show worth.
A friend who is not, is an opportunity to show friendship.
It's the acceptance, acknowledgement and respect of the fact that they could accomplish a task, but to go along and help out anyway. Because you enjoy their company, and because it makes an onerous task less so, that is the very essence of a friend.
I don't like being dependant on someone else.
Today I got a lift to tescos to get some shopping. And it seems strange, but I felt uneasy doing so.
Which is odd, because the other way round, I'd have been quite comfortable.
I think I've figured something out. I don't like owing a debt to someone who I'm not sure I could repay. I guess it's one of these karmic balance things. I don't like asking for a favour from someone, because whilst in many cases I'm aware that I'd be able to, I don't want to inconvenience. I think it's because I don't like to be thought of as a burden, or a 'taker'.
There's the old adage that "A friend in need, is a friend indeed". But putting it to the test is not something that a friend would do.
The problem is, that neither actually make for a growth in friendship. Any relationship is about giving and taking.
I don't think that giving but not taking is any better than taking but not giving. At one extreme you have a parasite. At the other a loner.
One of the cornerstones of friendship, I believe, is the ability to help someone who doesn't need it.
A friend in need is an opportunity to show worth.
A friend who is not, is an opportunity to show friendship.
It's the acceptance, acknowledgement and respect of the fact that they could accomplish a task, but to go along and help out anyway. Because you enjoy their company, and because it makes an onerous task less so, that is the very essence of a friend.
